How to Be You

How to Be You

by Owen Fourie

Are you tired of being a robot, a push-button slave of the system, doing what others have designed for you to do?

Your goals and your plans to achieve them, do they ever work out?

Some say that such goal setting and planning wastes your time and energy.

Jeff Goins has written a fine article that breathes a refreshing spirit into a world that is tired of the bondage of agendas and plans that inevitably frustrate us and sometimes enslave us.

You would do well to read his article. Click on the text link at the end of this post.

What he wrote set me thinking. Here are some of my thoughts.

These are not absolutes. Accept them. Reject them. Do what you will with them. Perhaps you can fill in any gaps to suit your life and, by all means, comment as you see fit.

When you are bound to a plan, you

  • fetter yourself to an agenda (someone else’s or your own) and become a dutiful slave;
  • frustrate yourself as the course of life flows by, and you are stuck in or obsessed with a plan that is like an operations’ manual or a text book, not an unfolding story;
  • fight the changes in your life and circumstances and buckle under stress as these changes take on the appearance of gigantic obstacles to the accomplishment of your goals;
  • favor doing more than being: you have to do this now to be that in the future (instead of simply being who you really are now and doing what you do because you are you);
  • fixate on conformity and control, and you become who someone else wants you to be or who you think you need to be to impress others.

When you are not bound to a plan, you

  • focus on what you do well and enjoy doing according to your values, standards, and priorities, forming new habits to improve your talents as you go;
  • flow with the course of life—the unfolding story—and enjoy the saga;
  • flex with the changes in your life and circumstances, and relax because your eternal self remains unperturbed. (This does not mean passivity in the face of destructive forces.);
  • favor being more than doing. Enjoy being who you are and this will give meaning and purpose to what you do, without being shackled to any agenda;
  • free yourself from conformity and be who you are despite prejudices, potshots, and profiling.


What do you think? What is your perspective? Are there similar matters that you would like to see in this self-help category? Your comments, observations, and questions are welcome.


“You Don’t Need a Plan to Change Your Life” by Jeff Goins

Note particularly what the author says about creating new habits and focusing on those habits in lieu of setting goals and having a plan.

Other articles that may be of interest to you:

“The Individual vs. the Illusion of Consensus Reality”

“The Individual vs. the Planned Society”


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